Recently, my husband and I were preparing to go home on a weekend when a relative asked us to bring her daughter, a university student with us. As the journey from Colombo to her home takes a few hours by a bus, we gladly agreed.

Throughout the journey, the girl barely spoke. Instead, she was on the phone murmuring to her boy friend or asleep. It was like we had dragged her by force to ride with us. I was fuming inside.

The next day, she joined us for the return trip. Only then we got to know that she had to be at her hostel before a deadline. We had to drive nonstop for 5 hours and drop her at the hostel with a few minutes from the deadline.

Was she thankful? Never. She just got down and walked to the hostel without looking back. We had planned to spend the night at a friend’s home on the way back and had to abandon the plans because of her. But all we got for the trouble was a bunch of unpleasant memories.

We could not believe why the girl could not get down saying thank you.

Even before that incident, I had the feeling that most of the time, younger generations (including us) is very lenient with gratitude and saying thank you. It is like we have formed a habit of taking everything for granted.

When it comes to being grateful and paying back, our grandparents were the best. They remembered every little thing another has done for them, and tried to compensate throughout their lives.

Our parents were a bit relaxed, but they were better than us.

But we have a very limited memory capacity with gratitude these days.

When there are stories about people who has rescued others from drowning, a familiar saying at the end is “I rescued this much of lives, but only one or two came to thank”.

It is very evident in transportation when a person has to donate his much desired seat to a lady who is pregnant or carrying a child. Most of the time, the lady will sit down without even looking at the human who had to give the seat for her comfort. It is as if the world must treat her like that.

All of us will have a memory where we had to get a leave from a grudging boss, travel for hours, get dressed in an unknown salon and appear at the wedding of a close one, but eventually got the feeling that our coming did not make any difference. A mere “I’m so glad that you could make it, thank you” would have made up for all the trouble we took.

Even for your parents, sibling, husband or wife, do not treat them as they owe you anything. Thank your wife spends hours making a meal, even if it turns out lousy. Cover your mother with thanks for running around all day after your toddler. Thank your father for buying your favorite fruit from the seller. Thank your lazy servant when she takes an extra effort. Thank a fellow worker when he does something you asked, even it is part of your job. You will not lose anything by that.

Thank your husband when he takes the heavy garbage bin out every morning. He will feel appreciated and will in turn help you more.

Take my word when I say a thank you can only benefit you in the long run. It will make the people around you happy, and will in turn make you happier too.

Pavithra Abhayawardana (BSc Eng(Hons), AMIESL-12403)